Monday, August 3, 2015

He walked the plank. Yarr.

[Please forgive this atrocious piece of roleplay. It was amusing over a hefty glass of wine.]

Zappity > 50m and i will let you go
Zappity > this be a ransom demand, yarr
Worthy Adversary > yarr

(A highsec Raven had aggressed my humbled Ishkur while I was innocently pilfering loot from his mission wrecks.)

Zappity > do you decline?
Zappity > for i may be forced to bring in the Orca of Reshipping

(Actually, I must confess that this was all bluff. I have an Orca alt but she was on the other side of the map and I've never used her for highsec shenanigans.)

Worthy Adversary > well I dont know
Zappity > you have a hefty tank. methinks it be made of whale hide

(Translation: he had an active tank which I was barely scratching.)

Worthy Adversary > sort of fell for your trap didnt I
Zappity > that be so, matey
Worthy Adversary > you could just let me go
Zappity > yarr, but the act of deactivating yon warp scrambler is so tiring it deserves some pennies
Worthy Adversary > you dont want pennies
Zappity > i be awaitin' a counter offer

(His valiant alt arrived in a Kestrel. I stayed on the Raven and sent my drones after the Kestrel. He managed to escape deep in hull.)

Zappity > when will your parrot return? or was it a Kestrel?
Zappity > he be a fiesty specimen
Worthy Adversary > Kestrel but he wont be back
Zappity > ye showed some spirit so i am willing to lower my accustomed fee
Zappity > 10m and you're a'sailin free
Worthy Adversary > well thank you - to what
Worthy Adversary >  10 mil is fair
Worthy Adversary > how do I know you will leave me alone
Worthy Adversary > once I have paid
Zappity > you must trust me. but i be an honourable pirate, yarr
Worthy Adversary > lol

(Sigh. You lot make life so difficult sometimes.)

Zappity > my patience be wearing thin, ya briny barnacle
Zappity > the old Orca, she takes a while to align but helpful she surely is
Worthy Adversary > Yes I am sure
Zappity > and I sense ye are a'stallin, waiting for a fleet sailing in on the winds
Zappity > if it give thee comfort, I be a member of the Honourable Ransomers' Club:

(Whether this would have had any effect we shall never learn. At this moment his alt arrived again, this time in a Drake.)

Zappity > treachery!

(I had lost my Suspect flag and so sent the Drake a duel request. He had set it to auto-reject so I had to wait for him to summon up the courage.)

Zappity > yon Drake will need to send a duel request for i no longer be suspect
Worthy Adversary > yeah noticed
Zappity > i be willing to take on the two of ye
Zappity > foul play be damned!
Worthy Adversary > why dont I feel this is a good idea

(Ha! He aggressed! And didn’t take the chance to depart while I burned the ~30km from the Raven to the Drake. I knew I couldn’t break the Raven and wanted a crack at the battlecruiser.)

Worthy Adversary > still want 10 mil

(This came after I broke his shield. It was a passive regen tank and it was very close. I needed overheated guns to crack it and reached 80% heat before getting past peak regen.)

Zappity > ye had your chance, now thee walks the plank!
Worthy Adversary > fair enough
Zappity > gf, catch you around mate
Worthy Adversary > cu

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